Mattie's Memoirs

You've no doubt heard of me. I'm the cute redhead in the picture to the right. On another page on this web site, my mommy referred to this picture as me "editing" her work. Nothing could be further from the truth. I was dictating the story to her.

Yes, it's true. I'm the power behind the throne. And now I'm taking this opportunity to tell you stories in my own words and under my own name. But I have to hurry before Mommy comes back and finds me at her computer.

Mattie Terrell is now a columnist for The Robeson Reporter in Lumberton, North Carolina.She will be touring the town and attending special events and writing about them in future issues.
I am actually the original p.m.terrell. That's right. She stole my name. All this time, you thought "p.m." stood for "Patricia McClelland". Well, maybe it does. But it also stands for "Princess Matilda". That's me. Mattie, for short. Feel free to call me "Your Highness" until you know me better. Much better.
I am a "Treeing Walker Coonhound". Pure royalty. I come from a long line of hounds (let's just drop the "coon", it sounds so backwoodsy) and through a twist of fate I ended up at the SPCA in Richmond, Virginia, just waiting for servants to come and whisk me away. Every day it was the same thing. Over and over, I interviewed humans for the position. And when the Terrells came in, I saw "sucker" written all over them. So I chose them as my new servants.

So, what does a Treeing Walker Coonhound do? We are bred to hunt raccoons. We are usually nocturnal, except when our servants create a problem with that. Tracking raccoons at night is our specialty. When we find one, we tree it. That's right, rush that little sucker right up into the branches. And howl like the dickens. And we get points for how fast we find the 'coons, and how good we tree it. I'm the best. Never been in a competition, but I know I'm the best. Royalty knows these things.

And what, you may ask, do we do with the raccoon once we've treed it? Nothing. Ever been to a fancy restaurant and ordered 'coon? I rest my case. After we tree it, we all go home. Even the 'coon.

When I'm not hunting, I am playing with my dolls. In the picture to the left, you'll see a singing fool. That's my brother, Skipper. We were from the same litter, so Mommy and Daddy call us "the Twins". He's a Treeing Walker Coonhound, too. Duh. Better get that thinking cap on or I'll leave you in the dust.

Anyway, Skipper has been practicing for next season's American Idol. He also enjoys singing opera. Daddy said if he had been a human he would have been a ballerina. I'm not so sure that's a compliment.

Funny, his pose is the same one we use when we tree a raccoon.

Here I am with my Mommy, the one who stole my initials. I was getting ready to hold court. I was practicing the "Queen Victoria" look. I think I look hot. Bet I'd look better in hot pants. Hot pink hot pants. Dig?

So... anyway, I will be posting my memoirs on this web page whenever I feel like it. Right now, I am working on a story about the cats next door. They are truly fascinating.

It all started with one cat. A white one. Then before I knew it, she had a litter of kittens. Then there were two white cats and a tabby running around. Sometimes, I would see them in my yard and throw myself at the storm door until one of the servants let me out. Once, I almost caught one but then stopped short. I'm a coonhound. Bred to find the critters. But no one ever told me what to do when I caught one. So I stopped short of actually catching it.

Okay, so now the cat has had another litter of kittens. And they are just on the other side of the fence. I am obsessed with them. I sit for hours looking between the slats in the fence, watching them.

I wake up Mommy and Daddy in the middle of the night and force them to let me outside so I can sleep next to the fence and listen to their little meows. I dream of having a litter just like them.

Only mine would be royalty, of course.
I hear Mommy returning so I'll upload this puppy real fast. And she'll never be the wiser. Check back periodically, and I'll have more information. I plan to go on various expeditions and adventures. So stay tuned. You never know where I might end up... or what I might get into...